Bone of my Bones

And Adam said:

“This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

(Genesis 2:23-24 NKJV)

God had created Adam in His image and likeness. Adam therefore, not only bore a resemblance to his Creator but shared in His nature, so he knew love and had the ability to love. Adam was in perfect harmony with God and the rest of creation, but God, knowing that He was not alone in His existence, recognized that Adam, made in His image and likeness, would soon feel the lingering emptiness of his lonely existence in the Garden, since he was alone in terms of compatibility. Not one of God’s other creations was like Adam, so God observed that “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” (Genesis 2:18 NKJV).

And Eve was created from one of Adam’s own bones, a rib, a side breast so to speak, as a “helper opposite him”, a suitable companion who would stand face to face with Adam, a fitting partner, well-suited and well-matched. A comparable helper made of the same flesh, and having the same “essence”. This is the same “essence” we share with Jesus Christ, our Redeemer, who became a flesh and bone human being. This “essence” is indeed the Holy Spirit. Incidentally, the word for bone in Hebrew means “essence” and is symbolic of your innermost self, which provides stability and strength. Isn’t that what the indwelling Holy Spirit does? 

God had created many things for Adam but only Eve was created from the deepest part of Adam himself. Eve was his innermost desire. She was that creation with whom he could become truly united in love. And together they could “be fruitful and multiply”, in other words, get on with the business of producing children (see Genesis 1:28). The concept of family radiated from there.

A man leaving his mother and father to join to his wife, is a unique coupling, for even though in the Garden of Eden it was Adam’s physical bone that was used to create his marriage to Eve, today when male and female marry, a spiritual “bone of my bones” is bonded. And when they come together in sexual intercourse a “flesh of my flesh” or “flesh from my flesh” results, and the two become one flesh. However, both conditions must be present for this incredible spiritual union of man and wife to occur.

Natural marriage is supposed to be a reflection of this spiritual principle, where such a strong bonding of the bones or framework of marriage is created that it cannot be broken. It is supposed to echo the qualities that this first marriage possessed – two becoming one in perfect harmony, fellowship and love with God, and with each other. Man and wife, two separate persons journeying as one but still with their distinct personalities and functions, walking together in mutual agreement, properly aligned and in Divine order. What a lovely picture of marriage…yet that is not the picture that we see nowadays. What gets in the way?

Ah yes, selfishness again rears its ugly head. There can be no selfishness in this spiritual union, that pattern of marriage that God, from the beginning, intended to exist. Selfishness was never part of His design but then the fall from grace and the simultaneous separation from God of the perfect couple occurred in the Garden, and that wonderful chemistry was lost. But the redemptive work of Jesus Christ at Calvary has restored the reverential expression of unselfish love that is supposed to be the hallmark of genuine marriage.

Now a man and his wife have the opportunity to experience this wonderful inner union by giving God His rightful place in their marriage. It begins with their love for God and then for one another and it’s this deep love upon which the foundation of their relationship must be built. Too often married couples allow selfishness to supplant that love as they seek to control and possess their spouse, but this spells unhappiness in marriage. 

Marriage is a fusion of two and not about one and one. When we only have regard for the welfare of “I” the most intimate facet of the divine tenet of marriage is prostituted and domestic misery ensues. Married couples cannot be so engrossed in their outward flesh lives that they fail to experience the inward bone life – there must exist a marriage of the two. The “bone of my bones” and “flesh of my flesh” cannot be divorced one from the other. Even persons who may be enjoying married life from a natural perspective, how much greater a life of marriage they would have if they built it upon that spiritual foundation. 

Whether you are already married or ever plan to, the questions that follow must be answered, 

Are you fit for marriage?

Are you more physically bonded than spiritually united?

Is your marriage only “flesh of my flesh” without “bone of my bones”?

Tradition dictates that we commit to vows of marriage and attempt to keep those vows, but we must be mature enough to be faithful even if those vows did not exist. It takes three to journey this road – you, your spouse, and God, and the more you both truly love God, the more His love will flow into you and your love into each other. This liquid love precipitates the merging of the two into one flesh – bone of my bones. 

Amen†

Bone of my Bones

Shelley Johnson May 2, 2017